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I know this seems like a no brainer but I am amazed at how often people make excuses for those acting crazy. It is as if people think that insane people do exist but unless they are raving they are not insane.
As much as intelligence is multifaceted, insanity also manifests in many ways. It can be overtly insane like a murderer or other criminal, or it can be covert. Secret backstabbers and those who mentally abuse are great examples. They create havoc in relationships and ruin people’s lives. This is insane behaviour despite that fact that TV and movies make it appear “normal”. When you identify people with these and tendencies the best you can do for both yourself and them is to maintain a healthy distance.
The good things in life are what make it worth living. If you focus on the negative things, you will not be happy. We do have to give some consideration to the bad in life but make sure the good overbalances it. Revenge for the sake of revenge never feels good when it is carried out and, believe it or not, it ties you to the person that you have taken revenge against. You will never be free of that person in your thoughts and mind thereafter. Sometimes you do have to act against a person to stop the damage they are wreaking on others. This is a correct action in the grand scheme of things. But revenge just for revenge’s sake is evil. I don’t care how many movies make it seem okay. Your enemies will expect attacks but will never expect compassion.
I learnt that the hard way during my youth service. Learn how to stand alone on your well thought-out opinions and decisions – and be willing to chest the consequence whichever way it goes. However, this can be trouble for some folks especially in terms of marriage and our African-parents. Come and ask me!
There are times in life where you will disagree with just about everyone else. This does not mean you are wrong. Sometimes a lot of people can be wrong all at the same time. If this were not true, Hitler would have been squashed the first minute he started talking.
Back in January 2002, there was an accidental detonation of a large stock of military high explosive at Ikeja Military Cantonment that shook Lagos to its root, it was devastating. When the media broke the news to the world, it met me in my hostel, back then I didn’t have a mobile phone. I ran from my college hotel to town (a distance of more than 1500 meters) to use the nearest phone booth. Only to get there and realise I didn’t take along my jotter where I had my dad’s number, the only phone in the family at the time. I trekked back to my hostel socked in my tears, sweating, praying for my family’s safety all along. In fact, everyone was calling everyone they knew in Lagos and phones lines were congested. The lesson from this is that when disaster strikes, you don’t give a flying hoot in hell about your possessions. All you care about is the people you love. You have many people, but your kids (if you already have some) and your immediate relatives have only you.
I work in a University community and I get amazed by the rate at which some of these guys do drugs…Tramadol and all. I even hear some people of them sniff dried and powered lizard shits and dried and powdered gutter spirogyra now.
I have honestly had my fair bout of the temptation to experiment drugs (those who know me may wonder) but the choice was mine to look away. We all make foolish mistakes when we’re younger – it all catches up with you eventually, and, for some of us, that mistake is smoking. It might have been cool as undergrads, but it’s not a habit that is good for your health or those around you. And it’s pretty pricey, too. There is a lot of hype about drugs today, both medicinal and street drugs. Understand that a body kept in good condition, given the vitamins and nourishment it requires and repairs itself. If you are having trouble, look to nutrition first unless it is a medical emergency.
In the last 30years my off-school time was possibly few years before Jele osimi (which was a school in itself) and my NYSC waiting time. By my estimation I realised I have spent an average of 25years in from of black or white boards. Listening to what they want me (us) to know, basically developing our cognitive and very little or nothing about the socio-affective or psychomotor. Even the cognitive na wash (dead curriculum). One of my professor who was in his late 60s once dictated to us from his undergraduate jottings. And he made bold to say he keeps records and he is giving us a bite of when Nigerian education was at it best. I shook my big head.
4/30 #30LifeLessons: You are responsible for every action you take in life and every condition your life is in.
This sounds harsh and I had a hard time with that until I asked myself, “Who is the most motivated person to see that my life works out the way I want it to?” The answer is ME. So the next question is, “Who is really going to take responsibility to ensure that my life works out the way I want it to?” Again, there is only one answer, ‘ME’. “If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.” -Frank Zappa. Yes, your mom and your wife and everyone who cares about you want your life to work out but who is the one who makes all of the billion everyday decisions that drive your life? It is you. Constantly motivate yourself! You are and will be your own greatest cheer leader.